Note this is a follow up to my initial Meditation post you can check out here.
Obvi but necessary disclaimer: No guru here, just a student of life interested in sharing what he’s gathered from multiple sources and experiences.
December seemed an ideal time to escape the holiday crazy train, look inward and prepare myself to best deal with the added end o’ year excitement. I’d also just gotten married (woo hoo!), traveled to South America for our honeymoon, was visiting family across the country for the holidays, and was getting ready to move cities… all exciting changes, but a lot of change, nonetheless.
The first few days of sitting to meditate were rough… I caught myself checking the time like a man on death row and realizing I’d been following a runaway train cruising off into some remote region of thought, including meta thoughts about the experience and what I’d write about it (d’oh) before nudging myself (more of a mental headbutt) back to focusing on the meditation guide’s voice. Day 7 was first day I made it through a session without once checking the time remaining – woo hoo!
What did I do right?
I found a great free beginners’ course on the Insight Timer app (with whom I have no affiliation) that had me looking forward to my sessions. I continued with guided meditations vs. freeform—meditating silently or to some ambient sounds—as it keeps me more focused. I learned tips and heard affirming messages–e.g. an orchestra of monkeys is banging their cymbals inside other people’s heads too–from the guides that helped make the process enjoyable and productive.
What did I do wrong?
I let the holiday/travel craziness influence the timing of my practice, meditating at different times of day. It worked for December since I’d been applying Dojo-like diligence to fitting it in, but I need to be more consistent for sustainability going forward. Ended up missing a day (d’oh) though learned to be more compassionate with myself with minor setbacks like this. After all…
“Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without.’
-Confucius
Final Meditations
The combination of this experiment along with two books I was reading at the time, Daily Stoic, and 10% Happier, has made another noticeable change to my outlook. There was a piece in Daily Stoic suggesting that our devastation is directly related to how likely we believe an event is to occur. You shouldn’t be (that) devastated about having to file your taxes this year because we accept and expect tax season to come every year. Along these lines, imagine your favorite mug already broken. If at some point, it gets knocked off the coffee table by your dog’s overactive tail—a likely scenario for me—you will be less bummed because you’ve made yourself conscious that this could easily happen at any moment and that you should appreciate having it until that point. Similarly, if, hypothetically speaking, you expect a president to sputter an endless stream of ridiculous, selfish, and inaccurate remarks, you may be slightly less enraged when his actions are fully in line with your expectations. Expect to be unexpectedly and inconveniently caught in traffic and understand it has nothing to do with you—no one is conspiring against you to make it happen—and it will lessen the blow a bit.
(I recommend both of the above books, especially Daily Stoic for those who appreciate the manageability of literally having just one page a day to read.)
Finally, I’ve concluded that meditation is like running and eating salads. I know it’s good for me and that I usually enjoy the experience more than expected but I sometimes struggle to take the first step/bite/breath. Just like setting out clothes the night before a morning run or buying the tastiest salad ingredients (yes to avocado and pepitas, no bitter greens or raw red onions, thank you) and finding an ideal time, comfortable spot, and tool to help simplify (ahem, Insight Timer) will reduce the friction to building good habits. Starting with guided meditations of 5-10 minutes and eventually building to 10-15 minutes work well for balancing benefits with compliance. Again…
“Perfect is the enemy of good.’
-Voltaire
I’ve carried my practice into 2019 with me and look forward to continuing it, knowing it ain’t gonna be perfect, but it’s gonna be good.
Leave me a comment with any experiences you’ve had with meditation, tips to share, or what you think my next experiment should be:
- Daily Intermittent Fasting (restricting eating to 8-12 out of 24hrs)
- CrossFit 3x/week
- Sensory Deprivation Therapy (Float Tank) 1x/week
- Daily Journaling
- Your suggestion?
As always, any other feedback is welcome.
In the meantime, I’ll be training for and competing in an insane, unsanctioned ultra relay race experiment called The Speed Project with some badasses from Electric Flight Crew.
Peace!